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“But if serving the Lord seems undesirable to you”, which implies that serving the Lord could be undesirable to certain people, and it could be the reason why certain people today don’t regard God in their lives, in their families and all that they do. Joshua then proceeded thus: “then choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve, whether the gods your ancestors served beyond the Euphrates, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land you are living. But as for me and my household, we will serve the Lord.”
Joshua 24:15 (NIV)
Listen to Podcast: Raising Godly Family in an Ungodly World
The rate at which the world is deteriorating is so alarming. If you take a careful examination at what is happening in our world, viz-a-viz what the Scripture says, you would definitely come to that conclusion that this is not how God planned the world to be.
The present world that we find ourselves, is fast becoming more unrighteous and ungodly, and the reason is not because there is no God. The reason is because men have chosen to follow their own ways and abandoned the old ways (Jeremiah 6:16). Apostle Paul said in 2 Timothy 4:3-4 that “for the time will come when they will not endure sound doctrine, but according to their own desires, because they have itching ears, they will heap up for themselves teachers, and they will turn their ears away from the truth, and be turned aside to fables.”
Also, in 2 Thessalonians 2:9-12, the same apostle Paul also wrote this: “The coming of the lawless one is according to the working of Satan, with all power, signs, and lying wonders, 10 and with all unrighteous deception among those who perish, because they did not receive the love of the truth, that they might be saved. 11 And for this reason God will send them strong delusion, that they should believe the lie, 12 that they all may be condemned who did not believe the truth but had pleasure in unrighteousness.” The reason why we read all these Scriptures is to establish why the world has remained this ungodly despite the fact that there is God.
Ever since Satan was cast to the earth, the earth has never remained the same, and one area he is channeling his energy day and night into, is how he can destabilize godly families. The devil would do everything within his power to make sure that families are not united because the moment families are united, the world would become a better place. But he does not want this to happen because the devil thrives in disarray and in chaotic environments. In Genesis 3, we saw how he interrupted the plans of God for Adam and Eve as regarding their marriage. Apart from that, do you know that the first mention of Satan after Pentecost was in relation between a man and his wife?
In Acts 5:1-5, the Bible says: “But a certain man named Ananias, with Sapphira his wife, sold a possession. 2 And he kept back part of the proceeds, his wife also being aware of it, and brought a certain part and laid it at the apostles’ feet. 3 But Peter said, “Ananias, why has Satan filled your heart to lie to the Holy Spirit and keep back part of the price of the land for yourself? 4 While it remained, was it not your own? And after it was sold, was it not in your own control? Why have you conceived this thing in your heart? You have not lied to men but to God.” Did we see that? Satan does not want marriages to succeed because he knows that the moment marriage succeeds, the purpose of God on earth would go unhindered.
But I want us to go back to Malachi 2:14-16 to see one of the plans of God for marriage from the very beginning and as regarding raising godly family. The Bible says:
“And this you do with double guilt; you cover the altar of the Lord with tears [shed by your unoffending wives, divorced by you that you might take heathen wives], and with [your own] weeping and crying out because the Lord does not regard your offering any more or accept it with favor at your hand. Yet you ask, why does He reject it? Because the Lord was witness [to the covenant made at your marriage] between you and the wife of your youth, against whom you have dealt treacherously and to whom you were faithless. Yet she is your companion and the wife of your covenant [made by your marriage vows]. 15 And did not God make [you and your wife] one [flesh]? Did not One make you and preserve your spirit alive? And why [did God make you two] one? Because He sought a godly offspring [from your union]. Therefore, take heed to yourselves, and let no one deal treacherously and be faithless to the wife of his youth. 16 For the Lord, the God of Israel, says: I hate divorce and marital separation and him who covers his garment [his wife] with violence. Therefore, keep a watch upon your spirit [that it may be controlled by My Spirit], that you deal not treacherously and faithlessly [with your marriage mate].”
Malachi 2:13-16 (AMPC)
Having children is not all there is to marriage, but it is sure an integral part of the marital union. There are a number of ways in which fruitfulness in marriage can be measured. For example, fruitfulness in marriage can be measured by the joint effort of the husband and wife and what that effort produces within the marital union. Ecclesiastes 4:9 says “two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their labor.” Another way fruitfulness in marriage can be measured is through the fruit of the womb. Psalms 127:3-5 says:
Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord,
The fruit of the womb is a reward.
4 Like arrows in the hand of a warrior,
So are the children of one’s youth.
5 Happy is the man who has his quiver full of them;
They shall not be ashamed,
But shall speak with their enemies in the gate.
So, as we have seen in Malachi 2, the search light of God is on godly marriages to raise godly offspring who would transform this world and make it a better place. In case you don’t know yet, the real purpose of marriage is towards expanding the frontiers of God’s kingdom on earth. Marriage is God’s idea and not man’s idea and so, when you are thinking about marriage, what it simply means is that you are thinking about the kingdom, or simply put, you are kingdom-minded. That is why anyone who does not see himself or herself as a man or woman who should get married, is simply not kingdom-minded.
So, how do we raise godly family in an ungodly world? I am going to give us three points that is like an umbrella points under which every other thing subsumed when it comes to raising godly families.
- Becoming A Godly Parent
The starting point to raising a godly family is that the parent themselves must be godly. Like the saying goes “you cannot give what you don’t have.” It is almost impossible for ungodly parents to raise godly children, except if God in His own benevolence, interrupts the journey of those children to bring them to His own side. The Scripture says “train up a child in the way he should go so that when he is old, he will not depart from it.” The truth is: How do you train up a child in the way of the Lord when the parents themselves aren’t godly?
This is why as a child of God; you cannot afford to marry just anybody or marry anyhow. You must marry in line with the will of God for your life and destiny. Let us see the story of Judah in Genesis 38:1-6 to buttress this point.
“It came to pass at that time that Judah departed from his brothers, and visited a certain Adullamite whose name was Hirah. 2 And Judah saw there a daughter of a certain Canaanite whose name was Shua, and he married her and went in to her.”
Now, Judah is the fourth son of the forced marriage between Jacob and Leah. The reason I used the phrase “forced marriage” is simply because Leah was not Jacob’s original choice, it was her younger sister, Rachael. But because of family tradition, Leah was forced on Jacob. I believe you still remember the story, right? Now, the first thing that Judah did that was against the commandment of God for his family and lineage was to go and marry from the people that God had warned them not to marry from. Come with me to the book of Deuteronomy 7:1-4. The Bible says:
“When the Lord your God brings you into the land which you go to possess, and has cast out many nations before you, the Hittites and the Girgashites and the Amorites and the Canaanites and the Perizzites and the Hivites and the Jebusites, seven nations greater and mightier than you, 2 and when the Lord your God delivers them over to you, you shall conquer them and utterly destroy them. You shall make no covenant with them nor show mercy to them. 3 Nor shall you make marriages with them. You shall not give your daughter to their son, nor take their daughter for your son. 4 For they will turn your sons away from following Me, to serve other gods; so, the anger of the Lord will be aroused against you and destroy you suddenly.”
So, Judah, out of his own stubbornness, went ahead to marry from a Canaanites against the plans and purpose of God for his lineage. But let us see what happens to that union in the following verses.
“So, she conceived and bore a son, and he called his name Er. 4 She conceived again and bore a son, and she called his name Onan. 5 And she conceived yet again and bore a son, and called his name Shelah. He was at Chezib when she bore him. 6 Then Judah took a wife for Er his firstborn, and her name was Tamar. 7 But Er, Judah’s firstborn, was wicked in the sight of the Lord, and the Lord killed him. 8 And Judah said to Onan, “Go in to your brother’s wife and marry her, and raise up an heir to your brother.” 9 But Onan knew that the heir would not be his; and it came to pass, when he went in to his brother’s wife, that he emitted on the ground, lest he should give an heir to his brother. 10 And the thing which he did displeased the Lord; therefore, He killed him also. 11 Then Judah said to Tamar his daughter-in-law, “Remain a widow in your father’s house till my son Shelah is grown.” For he said, “Lest he also die like his brothers.” And Tamar went and dwelt in her father’s house.”
God killed Onan because of his wickedness in the sight of God, and killed Er as well because of his ungodly actions. But where did all the consequences begin from? From an unholy alliance between Judah and a Canaanite woman that God has forbade them never to marry from. So, in order to raise a godly family in this ungodly world, it is very important that parents themselves are godly. Don’t marry outside of the will of God for your life. Marry in line with the will and purpose of God for your life and destiny.
- Instilling the culture of the word of God in your Family
If you want to raise a godly family in an ungodly world, you must instill the culture of the word of God in the family. I read a book sometimes ago about the Jewish culture and how devout Jewish families instill in their children from early days the memorization of the Torah. No wonder God said concerning Abraham in Genesis 18:19 (AMPC)s. The Bible says: “For I have known (chosen, acknowledged) him [as My own], so that he may teach and command his children and the sons of his house after him to keep the way of the Lord and to do what is just and righteous, so that the Lord may bring Abraham what He has promised him.”
When we look at the life of Eli, God did not bring His promise to pass concerning his priesthood because his children failed to toe the path of God and he did not call them to order.
See what God said concerning Eli in 1 Samuel 2:30-36:
“Therefore, the Lord God of Israel says: ‘I said indeed that your house and the house of your father would walk before Me forever.’ But now the Lord says: ‘Far be it from Me; for those who honour Me I will honour, and those who despise Me shall be lightly esteemed. 31 Behold, the days are coming that I will cut off your arm and the arm of your father’s house, so that there will not be an old man in your house. 32 And you will see an enemy in My dwelling place, despite all the good which God does for Israel. And there shall not be an old man in your house forever. 33 But any of your men whom I do not cut off from My altar shall consume your eyes and grieve your heart. And all the descendants of your house shall die in the flower of their age. 34 Now this shall be a sign to you that will come upon your two sons, on Hophni and Phinehas: in one day they shall die, both of them. 35 Then I will raise up for Myself a faithful priest who shall do according to what is in My heart and in My mind. I will build him a sure house, and he shall walk before My anointed forever. 36 And it shall come to pass that everyone who is left in your house will come and bow down to him for a piece of silver and a morsel of bread, and say, “Please, put me in one of the priestly positions, that I may eat a piece of bread.”’”
Instilling godly values early in your Family
“And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord” (Ephesians 6:4)
The other day, myself and the president were driving through a particular busy market road and we were hearing a very loud music coming from God knows where. We tried so much to make sense of what the singer was saying, and we couldn’t pick a single line that made sense. And then we realize, that some young folks actually would delight in this kind of song and the fact that societal value system is fast eroding. Raising godly family in an ungodly world requires that godly values are instilled in the family. 2 Timothy 1:3-5 and 3:12-15 says:
“I thank God, whom I serve with a pure conscience, as my forefathers did, as without ceasing I remember you in my prayers night and day, 4 greatly desiring to see you, being mindful of your tears, that I may be filled with joy, 5 when I call to remembrance the genuine faith that is in you, which dwelt first in your grandmother Lois and your mother Eunice, and I am persuaded is in you also.”
“Yes, and all who desire to live godly in Christ Jesus will suffer persecution. 13 But evil men and impostors will grow worse and worse, deceiving and being deceived. 14 But you must continue in the things which you have learned and been assured of, knowing from whom you have learned them, 15 and that from childhood you have known the Holy Scriptures, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith which is in Christ Jesus.”
Timothy became a mighty man of God simply because of the godly values that had been instilled in him from childhood. What godly values are you instilling in your family? These values would go a long way in shaping the character and the future of your household if they are properly inculcated early.
I believe you have learnt something!
[Centre for New Dimension Leadership]
