Marriages are in one of the worst situations in history today. From the political scene to the religious scene; many marriages are suffocating and collapsing. Raising very serious question in our hearts, “Could this be God’s intent for marriage?”. I definitely believe that God desired much more for marriage and His purpose will stand; however, there is a huge gap between God’s intention for marriage and our experiences today in marriage.
More than any other Scripture, Genesis 2:18 shows the purpose of a woman, which is to provide suitable help and companionship to man. However, before that point, God gave a purpose for marriage, “to exercise dominion on and over the earth on behalf of God (in the name of God). (Genesis 1:26). That was the purpose of marriage as intended by God! However, what we see today is far from the ideal. Many marriages are rather for fun than for function.
Many people now get married to satisfy sexual urges, eat good food, and enjoy service of their wives. Marriage is beyond all that! Marriages that fail are just marriages that fail to discover its essence – the reason for their bond and oneness. Come to think of it, if the two shall become one, and in the course of the marriage, the husband makes his wife his closest slave; what does it make that man? I think a “slave husband”! Remember, there are slave masters – the people who own or have slaves; hence, the man, whose wife is his slave is a “slave husband” – the man who own a slave wife!
If you had meditated a little on the discussion above, you will see that there is very little or no sense in a man being a slave husband. In actual fact, no man wants to be the husband of a slave; yet, many men are comfortable with their wives being no better than a slave in their houses. Apostle Paul said, anyone that his joined to a harlot is one body with her, for the two, He says, shall become one flesh. (1 Corinthians 6:16). Hence, a man who is joined with a slave is a slave too! You are who you make your wife to be!
Some women have become punching bags to their husbands; but in actual fact, those men are equally punching bags – both to the elements of the earth and the host of heavens. You are one with your wife! Therefore, the quickest way to become great, is to make your wife great!
Let me be more clearer! Who you make your wife, you will ultimately become. While women have responsibility of keeping the companies of their men, helping them to do the work God assigned to them (sometimes before they came into their lives); every man has a responsibility to name his own wife! (And Adam said, “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man” – Genesis 2:23). When Adam saw his wife, he did not see a slave; neither did he see a useless creature. He said, I see my bones in her bones, and my flesh in my flesh – she is just like me; in fact, she will become so and so. That is it! Remember, before the woman was brought to Adam, as soon as God was through with the creation of animals and He brought them to Adam, God told Adam to give them names, and whatever name Adam called them became their identity and destiny.
You see, your destiny as a man is in the name you give to your wife. If you give her a glorious name, if you cherish her and call her beauty, and you call her blessed; you will become great as a man, celebrated by others. Your wife is your mirror, if you want to know who you are and who you will become, look at your wife, who is she and who is she becoming. Your responsibility therefore as a man is to help your wife to become her best. Call her what God desires her to be called. Sometimes she could fall short of your own expectations; yet, you must keep her highly in your heart, for your own identity is in her destiny, and her destiny is your own identity.
Great husbands are therefore helping husbands. Putting it differently, helping husbands are leading husbands, who do not just ask their wives to go, but tell their wives, let us go! Helping husbands do not see their wives faults alone, their see their achievements and they loud them so well that their wives become better daily. Helping husbands help their husbands to grow and to glow! Wouldn’t you rather be a helping husband?
